An Unexpected Journey


The Naked Truth May 22, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — prettygirllost @ 12:12 AM

Retro Post #6 (see 5/10/11 to start at beginning)

My husband and I are sitting in a patient room at the oncologist’s office like two kids in trouble at a principal’s office.  What will she say?  Will she be nice?  How will I handle this?  I begin to fidget to distract my thoughts from going into full panic.

Doctor H is a beautiful lady who is a few years younger than me.  Thankfully she is nice and very personable.  As she talks about breast cancer, she draws some simple illustrations to help up better understand things.  I miss some of her explanations as my brain stops to digest what she already said.  It’s like hitting mute on the tv.   I see her talking but don’t hear her.  After she finishes teaching she asks if we have questions.  I know I have them but they are not available for access when my brain is numb.  Doctor H can tell we are overloaded and asks me to bring a list of questions on our next visit.  We will see her before the first chemotherapy treatment next week.  Me…chemo….they are not meant to be together.

Off I go to get more tests….bone scan, blood work, echocardiogram, chest x-ray.  Believe it or not, concentrating on these tasks actually helps keep me calm.  After a few of my tests, my husband and I get on an elevator to go to the second floor.  The silence is broken as I begin laughing out loud.  (Don’t worry, we are the only ones in the elevator.)  I tell him that I feel like everyone in the city has seen my chest today.  Who’s next?  He laughs with me.  It feels so good to release some tension.

I am relieved to get into bed after today’s doctor appointment, tests and the 2 hour drive back home.  I put all thoughts out of my head, except for those relating to sleep.  Everyone has different ways of keeping sane.  I guess avoidance and laughter are mine.  Nighty night.

  • Today’s Tip:  It’s okay to laugh even in such serious times of your life.  Your body needs a break from the stress it’s going through.

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